These glorious insults are from an era before the English language got boiled down to four letter words.
The exchange between Churchill & Lady Astor:
She said, “If you were my husband I’d give you poison.”
He said, “If you were my wife, I’d drink it.”
A member of Parliament to Disraeli: “Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease.”
“That depends, Sir,” said Disraeli, “whether I embrace your policies or your mistress.”
“He had delusions of adequacy.” – Walter Kerr
“He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.” – Winston Churchill
“I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure.” Clarence Darrow
“He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary.” – William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway).
“Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I’ll waste no time reading it.” – Moses Hadas
“I didn’t attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.” – Mark Twain
“He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends..” – Oscar Wilde
“I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend…. if you have one.” – George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill
“Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second…. if there is one.” – Winston Churchill, in response.
“I feel so miserable without you; it’s almost like having you here.” – Stephen Bishop
“He is a self-made man and worships his creator.” – John Bright
“I’ve just learned about his illness. Let’s hope it’s nothing trivial.” – Irvin S. Cobb
“He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others.” – Samuel Johnson
“He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up.” – Paul eating
“In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily.”
– Charles, Count Talleyrand
“He loves nature in spite of what it did to him.” – Forrest Tucker
“Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?” – Mark Twain
“His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork.” – Mae West
“Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go..” – Oscar Wilde
“He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts.. . for support rather than illumination. ” – Andrew Lang (1844-1912)
“He has Van Gogh’s ear for music.” – Billy Wilder
“I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn’t it.” – Groucho Marx
Have a great Christmas and new year from all of us at Clarks.
As with everything we do, there were no fireworks or fanfares, just a solid robust system delivered to the first user, a lettings agent in Surrey. They love it!
ClarksCloud Property Basic is a new generation of online estate agency software from one of the oldest most well established property software houses in the UK (that’s us by the way).
It handles residential sales, residential lettings and commercial properties.
This first release is the simple “property only” entry system which we’ve been developing over the past three years. It uses the most up-to-date development techniques to bring a whole new user interface and includes our new picture upload tool which is proving very popular.
It will be followed in the next few months by the CRM version (customer relationship management) which has all the applicant and vendor facilities you’s expect and much much more… start getting excited.
Have a look at some screen shots and a few of the facilities at ClarksCloud Property Basic
According to Rightmove the percentage of property searches made on mobile devices such as phones and tablets continues to rise at an incredible rate. Their figures state that 33% of all property searches are now made using a mobile device.
If your website doesn’t have a mobile friendly version, perhaps now’s the time to get that sorted! You can always speak to us, we’ve produced a huge number of mobile device friendly websites for our clients. Have a look at MOBILE WEBSITES and give us a call to discuss prices 01344 867170
In Spanish, unlike English, nouns are designated as either masculine or feminine.
‘House’ for instance, is feminine: ‘la casa.’
‘Pencil,’ however, is masculine: ‘el lapiz.’
So what gender is ‘computer’?’
Instead of giving you the answer, I ask you to consider the following before you make up your mind.
The case for it to be Masculine (‘el computador’), is:
1. In order to do anything with them, you have to turn them on;
2. They have a lot of data but still can’t think for themselves;
3. They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they ARE the problem; and….
4. As soon as you commit to one, you realize that if you had waited a little longer, you could have gotten a better model.
The case for a ‘computer’ to be of the feminine gender (‘la computadora’), is:
1. No one but their creator understands their internal logic;
2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else;
3. Even the smallest mistakes are stored in long term memory for possible later retrieval; and…
4. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your salary on accessories for it.